Image by masochismtango via FlickrTo be perfectly honest, I’ve never been a huge fan of sex in public. Sure, it may look hot in the movies. In books, it’s either over-the-top-erotic (which I can certainly appreciate) or a little embarrassing, but well worth the risk. In real life, it’s a little more complicated. You’ve got to balance risk and reward, and sometimes, it’s just not worth it.

But let’s talk about those times it is worth it. When your flight has been delayed for the fifth time, and nothing short of a trip to the airport bathroom with your lover will ease the frustration. Or when you’ve spent all night studying for your final exam, and in the morning, a quickie between the accounting books and the tomes on tax law is just what the professor ordered.

Here are some tips to keep in mind if you’re going to make the most of sex in public:

1. Wear a skirt - Not only is hiking up your skirt way more convenient than having to wobble with your jeans around your ankles, but you can also hide any evidence of your wild adventure much faster than you could otherwise.

2. Choose the right place - There’s sex in public (an elevator, the stall of a bathroom, the far end of a parking lot) and then there’s sex in public (a stairwell in a busy office building, the ice cream section of your supermarket, a bus stop). Choose wisely. Unless you like getting charged with public indecency — or worse.

3. Keep it down - By its very nature, sex in public involves other people. Uhh… that didn’t sound right. You know what I mean. There will be folks nearby, sometimes only a foot or two away. So keep the loud moaning, groaning, and name-shouting to yourself until you get home and do it again.

4. Be quick - This isn’t the time for you to show your lover how long you can go without stopping. Get in the elevator, have a wild ride (literally), and be done by the time you reach the 20th floor.

5. Watch what you touch - I know it’s hard to believe, but you’re probably not the first horny person to think of having sex… well, wherever you’re having sex. And most public places aren’t nearly as clean as you think.

So the next time you’re toying with the idea of being a little adventurous, keep these tips in mind. And if you can think of any I’ve missed, leave me a comment and let me know.

Go forth and fornicate!

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This entry was posted on Sunday, November 9th, 2008 at 11:33 am and is filed under Sex. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.